If it crunches, spit it out

I went to the doctor last week because I've been having some troubles with my tummy. I'm not going to go in to details but basically the doctor says I have IBS- Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Yes, friends, family and internet, I just said bowel without crawling in to a hole and dieing of embarassment.

The doctor said there are three things I need to do to make this not as painful, and three of which I've already decided I don't wanna do:
1) No raw fruits or veggies. WHAT?! I like fruits and veggies, please don't take those. He said if it crunches, spit it out. No celery, lettuce, salads, broccoli, apples, etc etc.
This is already not working out for me. I've already had to give up so many produce opportunities. Why couldn't he have said, no more Chinese food for you missy, and I would have said, oh damn!

2) Non-negotiable, 2 servings of fiber supplement daily. This means I have to dump this powdered Citrucel crap into my drink and guzzle it fast so that I don't taste it and it doesn't turn to pudding in my glass.

3) He prescribed these pills and why I don't know. He said it's an anti depressant that does nothing for depression and everything for IBS. Well, doc, I took these pills. If I wasn't depressed before I am now. I slept and slept and slept and slept, and if it weren't for Shelton dragging me out of bed, I'd still be sleeping.

So, I'm trying to follow the veggy rule, although it is hard. I'm trying to follow the fiber rule, but it is gross and i don't wanna. And I'm not taking any more of those toxic sleeping pills. This guy is going to have to find some other way or I'm just going to have to have a sick tummy for a long time.


Happy Birthday Daddy-O

Originally uploaded by oubrandi.
Today, Jan. 29, is my dad's birthday.

He just got back from Vegas and I spent a lot of time wishing him good luck at the tables, so does that count as a birthday present?

Actually, my gift was going to be a) going to Felipe's for dinner tonight without any negative remarks and b) having a quasi surprise birthday party for him afterwards.
He and mom left town as soon as the plane hit the tarmac. So, as the Soup Nazi would say, "No party for YOU!"

I love you dad! Hope the 48 is grrrreat!


I can't believe I'm sharing this

Ok, so you all know how I am when it comes to "this" subject. Boom-boom. The bad potty. Well, let me tell you, I've never been one for talking about it, and I've never been one for doing it when there are others near. It took the better part of a year for me to even go if Shelton was in the house after we moved in together. I finally got over that and having 2 bathrooms aided the process.
So the point of this post is that it is almost impossible to go boom-boom when you are living in someone elses home and there is only ONE BATHROOM and it is right off the living room. There is no chance of achieving secret boom-boom making. The first couple weeks, if i needed to go boom-boom, I would just go in and take a shower that way everything had cleared by the time I was out and no one was the wiser. That doesn't always work. I'm looking forward to having my own bathroom and my own boom-boom schedule again.

Now, part II. I'm so SICK of people going boom-boom at the office. I mean, if you gotta, then do it. But for the love of God, practice proper Office Boom-boom Etiquette. This would include, using the available air spray, FLUSHING, not leaving your boom-boom ON THE SEAT, did I mention flushing?


My 15 Minutes

I was cast in a commercial today! It's for one of our clients and we needed some free talent, so a couple of us girls said we'd do it. It was confusing though. I was asked yesterday and the way it was communicated to me was that we would be extras. I was like, yeah, no prob. I was told to dress like a groupie, grunge girl. I'm not really that kind of girl. So, I showed up rocking an old ad club tee, "create" with the backwards e, longsleeve shirt underneath and jeans. We ended up not shooting last night and had to do it today. So I get to work today and they are like, what did you bring to wear? I had brought the exact same thing from night before.

I get up to this way cool loft above our office to shoot the commercial and find out that we, the 4 girls, are it. We are the talent, no extras, just flat out it. I was like, WHAT!?! And I look like this?? It's 3pm and I've had a long hard day. Hell, my eyebrows aren't even waxed! Then they proceed to tell me we are doing this slumber party scene, ALL I HAVE ARE JEANS! Thanks for filling me in on ALL of the details guys! Luckily, one of the girls had brought extras.

The shoot was really fun. Middle of a very busy day and I got to drink beer, wear PJs and listen to good jams. Not a bad way to live. These will be ready to go in a couple weeks and then my sweet face will be on TV and Outdoor here in W-town.


Some sort of record

Originally uploaded by oubrandi.
Today ended my 17 day hiatus from the good Dr. Today I just got that craving and I couldn't resist any longer. As soon as the sweet liquid gold crossed over my lips I was transfered to some sort of euphoric state. It didn't last long though. About 10 minutes of "floating" was followed by 2 hours of headache. My body was like, No No!

Two Years ago my resolution was to cut back on Dr Pepper. I was very successful. Last year my resolution was to knock it to 1/week... again a success. This year, kiss it goodbye.

So long my love!


95 points

Oh yes baby! I got 95 points for spelling 'Punchers' on Literati, the online Scrabble. How did I do it? Well, punchers is sa 7-letter word- so I got the 35 point bonus. But I just happened to be able to play it on a triple word space AND it went all the way down to a double word space. Yes, I got 5x the points for my word.
That's hot!


Nothing beats old friends

Originally uploaded by oubrandi.
Last night Shelton and I made it back to Norman for the first time since we left. Sure feels good to be home.
So, we met up with our good friends Whitney and Patrick, not a couple. We had dinner at Charleston's, which was on my "must go" list and then followed that with drinks at DaddyWoos. We've known Whit and Patrick since Freshman year at OU. So many good memories. Last night was so enjoyable. We laughed, shared old stories and new, and I was taken back to a place I haven't been in a long time.
Here are some of my favorite Whitney/Patrick/Shelton/Brandi memories:

Spring Break playing Spin the Bottle

Killing the electricity to the TV while my crazy roomy tried to watch Dawson's Creek

Chinese Fire Drills

Old Navy anything

They think I almost killed them on the icy roads, I say I was saving their lives. Po-tay-toe, po-tah-tow.

and now I can add last night. Love you guys!!


otorinolaryngology mongoloids

Say What?! This is my 2 word Google search that made it on to the Google Whack list!!!
I have left the "h" in rhino out as to not create 2 hits.

What is GoogleWhack? Well, I'd give you a link but I don't know how to do that! But, you put any 2 words, no hyphens or other marks, into a google search and if you get only 1 hit, you qualify for GoogleWhack. We found a couple of others, but they were listed on word list sites.


Apple of my eye

Apple really pulled through today. But first, some background info:
Back in August they recalled some of the G4 powerbook batteries, mine qualified. So excited. So I put my order in online and waited. And waited. And waited. And listened to people receive their batteries. And I waited. So about 2 months of waiting we finally called (thank you Tony for the info). They said our order had been cancelled and that we could go online and re-order. So we did. And wouldn't you know it, it said we already had an existing order and would not process another. So, we called back. They said the batteries were backordered anyway and that we should just wait. Imagine my irritation.

Well, it's been 3 or 4 months since that phone call. So, Shelton calls Apple yesterday, explains the situation and finally gets someone on the line who wants to help. The guy says", here's the deal. I'll send you a new batter within a week. Just outright send you a free battery without messing with the recall. This way you don't have to worry about sending us back the original battery. (so now we have TWO!!). And, if the original battery you ordered ever shows up, just keep it." Fabulous!
Although it won't, that would bring the tally up to THREE! PLUS, I can still get my warranty battery, which makes FOUR!

Well, the guy said it would take a week, yesterday, for us to receive the battery. It was here by lunch today. Thank you nice man at Apple!


No More Wetting the Bed!

I almost wish that this was about Shelton or I trying to control some really bad habit we should have already outgrown. Unfortunately, it's about the dog. The people we are staying with have a basset hound, and I'm thinking of changing his name to pissy-peterson hound. I can now count FOUR TIMES this beast has pissed in MY bed in the last TWO weeks! Do you have any idea how damned gross and infuriating it can be to finally be in your PJs, getting situated under your covers, only to find you are laying in dry dog urine?!?!?! GRRRRRRRROSSSS!!!!!!! His infractions include: pissing on my down comforter (you ass, that one hurt), peeing on MY side of the bed #1, peeing on my side of the bed #2 and peeing on my side of the bed AND a little on my pillow. ARE YOU F*ING KIDDING ME?!??! He runs to the basement when he thinks no one is looking, and we aren't, and pisses. I don't know what I've done to make him this mad, but I dont' even feel like making it up to him now. So numerous washings of sheets, blankets, pillows and PJs have been done. The comforter, may she rest in peace and may we get another as an Ayyam-i-ha gift! We have now installed a baby gate and so that mo-fo is going to have to find some new peeing grounds. This plush little urinal is closed.


love no more

Originally uploaded by oubrandi.
It was announced yesterday and that Brad and Jennifer are splitting up. They are not filing for divorce, just splitting. Still yet, they were the ones that were supposed to make it. Right?! I know, I'm sadly hooked on Hollywood. I'm so sad for them. Why can't they still be in love? And, the truly sad part of all this, how will we EVER KNOW how the children of two of the most beautiful people in the world will look. It's like how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop... the world may never know.


Parental Surprise

I got off work on Friday and asked Shelton if we could go to dinner. We were hemming and hawing over that when Russ, the roomy, says my Dad just called and he's at my aunt's house. WHAT?! I was like way to be Captain Random. But then I remembered he was bringing his big 'ole generator down to my aunt and uncle since they are part of the unfortunate without power for at least another week. So, we look at each other, Shelton and I, and say, Looks like we're going out to dinner after all. Well, that high was quickly spoiled when it dawns on me Dad + Wichita = Felipes. What this means to Brandi: one grossy-Josie dinner. Felipe's is this Wichita'n institution. It's part of the lay of the land. Mexican food that is not my favorite. I love mexican food, just not their's. So we meet up with dad, and the aunt/uncle duo and head to Felipes. I had 2 Tecates and chicken strips!!
Anyhow, we spent the rest of the evening in my aunt's Cave/Amish dwelling using flashlights and lanterns. Dad and Uncle Britt swapped crazy delinquent stories of their youth. CRAZY everyone! Even Shelton left out of there like, Wow, I had NO IDEA! You're dad is crazy sometimes, but NO IDEA! It made me realize that even my best "bad" stories, are like strawberry shortcake on a sugar high- in other words, not that bad. Way to raise me mom & dad! It was a really nice evening and a nice surprise to get to spend it Dad.


Ice, Ice and more Ice, Baby

The weather outside is definitely frightful, and for the 70,000 people without power, inside is not so delightful.
Sheesh! This ice storm blew in yesterday and it has brought with it death and distruction. Death to the trees, not so many people. Our house has lost 2 trees, a tree fell where I usually park my car but just happened to not park there yesterday, trees EVERYWHERE! Electric company says power that is out won't be up for 7-10 days. I mean, damn! My fingers are crossed that we remain one of the few with power. It took me 40 minutes to literally chisel out my car this morning. I lost my gloves and don't have a scraper, so I was wearing socks on my hands and used a spatula to scrape. nice, huh?!

On the flip side, it is quite beautiful to look at. Everything is incased in ice, snow everywhere. It just kind of sucks.
Good luck to those of you in Oklahoma and Missouri about to be hit by this bitch. Find your gloves now.


Movie Marathon

Shelton and I had taken a little hiatus from the movies when we moved to Wichita. But over the last week or so, we have really made up for it. First, let me say, that going to the movies in Wichita is unlike going to the movies anywhere else, at least anywhere I've been. The Warren Theater is literally right outside my office. It is SO NICE! The seats and arm rests are made of Memory Foam and the seats are oversized, so way comfy. The aisles are very wide, I can't even get my feet to rest on the seats in front of me. There are also waiters. These waiters will bring you anything from the menu which has everthing from SweetTarts and Twizzlers to Burgers and Pizza. The prices are movie theater prices, but, not too bad. It's dinner & movie all from one seat. Also, props to Blockbuster for getting rid of late fees!!!!!!!

So, I thought I would give you a run down of the movies we have seen recently and what we thought about them.

The Incredibles: This was "incredible!" We really enjoyed it, granted, we love anything Pixar does.

Meet the Fockers: LOOOOVE IT! As always, not as good as the first, BUT, it was SO FUNNY in it's own right.

Spanglish: Who knew Sandler had this in him? He and Tea were both excellent. Worthy of a second watch AND a good cry.

Raising Helen: SO CUTE! So much better than I expected. I'm a softy for orphans though. Joan Cusack- yuck as always!

Garden State: WHAT A FANTASTIC MOVIE! Very impressed! A great story and very funny.

Shrek 2: Finally got to see this last week and it was great. I'm glad I got it for Christmas, I will definitely watch again.

Napoleon Dyanmite: I've officially seen it 3 times and now I own it. If you haven't seen it, goooooosshhhhhh, why not IDIOT!?

IRobot: Shelton says 6 stars out of 5, not cheesy sci-fi. Great film!

Manchurian Candidate: It was alright, 3 stars out of 4- per Shelton.