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The definition of "Retchid-Nasty-Funk"

I've never been known for having the cleanest cars. One of my faults... we've all got to have one I guess.

Last week, Friday maybe, I got in and there was a peculiar smell. I figured in the heat of the sun, something in the little trash sack was cooking. Gross, I know, but I could live with that.

We left the car parked over the weekend, as we took the Xterra to KC. So, that's 3 more days? All locked up with sealed windows and doors. Mmm-hmm, plenty of time to cook.

Yesterday, as we were racing out the door for a few doctor's appointments, I realized I had a flat. So we left my car and took the Xterra. But it was pouring rain, so before we left I grabbed my umbrella out of the trunk. Now, when I opened the trunk, the "peculiar" smell was now just nasty. But, no time to spare to investigate, I slammed the trunk shut and figured I'd deal with it later.

When I got in the Xterra the smell had followed. I noticed something sticky on the umbrella and figured that was the source, so I tossed in the back. Again, Monday morning, I'm not dealing w/ this crap.

So this morning at 7:15 I head out to air up my tire before work. When I opened the trunk, the most ungodly scent on this earth filled my head. I immediately figured something had made its way into the trunk and died. Because nothing on God's green earth could smell like that unless it were decomposing.

With breath held and gag reflex in full working order I began scanning the trunk for the perpetrator. And there it was, wrapped in a Wal*Mart sack, a gallon of milk that could not have been in there ANY LESS than 2 weeks. I came about that date because that was the last time I went on a big grocery trip, and I only put groceries in the trunk on a big trip.

SO UNBELIEVABLY GROSS! I removed the gallon of milk, only to find that it had somehow opened and was ALL OVER THE TRUNK. I placed the milk in the garbage, closed the trunk and began 20 minutes of dry heaves.

Once I was able to breath again, I called my neighbor/co-worker and asked for a ride. Seriously, not even dealing with that at 7:30 in the morning. I'd sooner chew my own leg off and beat myself with it.

So tonight, I've got to figure something out. The only things that keep circling in my head are open windows, febreze, bleach, and LOTS of trashbags. Because short of the Hope Diamond being back there, I'm not keeping any of it.

Here's an update:

By the time I made it home, my AWESOME husband had already removed all of the trunk's contents, had the washer going and another load waiting (always the convservative!), and had hosed down all the carpets.

I drove to work today, and aside from the overwhelming scent of OdorAway and Rainforest Rain Glade... it was a pleasant ride to work this morning.

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